Sunday, January 18, 2009

Broken Pieces and Loss

Today I was cleaning in our spare bedroom. On the dresser in this room is where I keep my beautiful cut glass cake stand. This was a gift from my sweet ex- daughter in law. She gave it to me several years ago. She was so proud to be able to give me a special gift. She had to work very hard for the money to buy it. It was a stretch to their budget to buy such a gift. Well as you guess it fell to the floor and broke into a million pieces. To say I was devastated is a understatement.

I stood their frozen in time not believing what I saw. There lay my beautiful cake plate shattered all over the floor. I was crying so hard. My poor husband was trying to console me.

You see I was not only crying for the loss of this gift but the loss of this young woman. I love this precious child as if she were my own!!!

She came into my life over 9 years ago when she married my son. I was suffering from another loss in my life at the time and she helped to heal my broken heart. She gifted us with a beautiful Granddaughter. From the very day she was born she shared her with us, allowing us to bask in the light of being Grandparents.

She and I shared so many special moments together. We would go to lunch and talk the afternoon away. We were more than friends we were Mother and Daughter. I still see her but not often and I miss her so much.

You see the only way I know to love is with all of me and when I hurt it is with all of me.

I sit here typing with tears running down my face thanking God for bringing her into my life and for being able to still tell her that I love her and will always have a special place in my heart for her!!!!

27 comments:

Vee ~ A Haven for Vee said...

Ohhh, Mary, I'm so sorry that your treasured cake platter was broken. I think I understand what it represents to you. Perhaps, you'll give this lovely lady a call and you can sit down again soon. You can go right ahead and choose her to be your daughter regardless of life's circumstances...

justabeachkat said...

What a beautifully written post. I'm so sorry Mary. Things may break, but our sweet memories and love stays without our heart. And that's a blessing.

Hugs!
Kat

a portland granny said...

I am so aorry about your lovely cake plate, especially because of the sentimental value. In reading your post, your love for this young woman must have had a tremendous positive impact on her life, as well as yours. I'm glad you have maintined a friendship even tho it isn't as often as you would like. I'm sure she sees the Lord Jesus in your life.

Betsy from Tennessee said...

Hi Mary, Your post almost made me cry too. The breaking of the glass plate just brought back all of the pain from your life happenings.

I too had a daughter-in-law that I adored. She was special since I had three sons and NO daughters. WELL--she and my son divorced--and I haven't seen her in years. She caused the break-up--but that still didn't mean that I didn't love her and want her in my life. That never happened.

Life can be hard at times.. Hang in there and try to remember the good times the two of you had together.

Lots of Hugs tonight,
Betsy

ShabbyInTheCity said...

I have been on a breaking spree! Cake plates and platters are my specialty too...I will watch for a pretty one in my travels...thankfully you didn't break your ex-daughter in law!

GARAGE SALE GAL said...

Hi Mary,
So sorry that your cake platter is broken :( At least you have the great memories and a wonderful Granddaughter.Who knows, maybe you will find another one just like it:)
Happy Monday.
Warmly,
Deb :)

vivian said...

AWWW Mary, that is too bad! I would be really upset too. Its so awesome that youve been able to maintain such a close and loving friendship with her after they split up. that is a real blessing! But every time i read anything you post, It is soo obvious that you are truely a blessed person and a blessing to many as well!
HUgS!!
vivian

Sandi @the WhistleStop Cafe said...

This is a precious post. Our lives are pieces of shining light that we gather over the years.
A lot like pieces of a broken glass.
I am touched!

Gwendolyn said...

Dear Friend,
I hear the anguish of your cry - not for the plate, but for the broken relationship, for something that once was so beautiful and now "appears" shattered. To love someone when love is not reciprocated and when we want nothing in return is to love like Christ loved us. This love as you've shown, withstands hurts come what may. One thing I have learned through a similar situation is that what I once knew as "good" can now be a "different good". God has not changed and He is still in the business of making things new! Love & Prayers!

Kathleen from Yesteryear Embroideries and Eggs In My Pocket said...

So sorry! I know how it feels to break something that you hold dear! The best things about memories... they don't break... and so glad you have such loving ones connected to this dish. Blessings, Kathleen

countrygirl3031 said...

Ohhh Mary, I so sorry about what happened to your beautiful cake plate. What a beautifully written post...I can tell you love her very much.

Hugz,
Michele

Mary said...

Mary,

Oh, that is terrible. I know the cake plate cannot be replaced. The sentimental value is priceless.

I'm glad that you and your sweet daughter in law are still in touch. Give her a call and make a date to have lunch or go shopping.

Like me, you love with every fiber of your being and when you hurt, you hurt with ever fiber of your being. However the love always outweighs the hurt.

What wonderful memories you have of this sweet woman. I hope you are able to get together with her soon.

Love and blessings,
Mary

PEA said...

Dearest Mary,

I can well understand how you're feeling about the broken cake platter that meant so much to you. A similar thing happened to me a couple of years ago and my heart was as broken as my little figurine that I cherished so much. Nobody and nothing can take your memories away, though. I do hope you can meet up with this young lady again real soon:-) xoxo

Theresa @ Take A Sentimental Journey said...

Oh sweet Mary, my heart goes out to you. I too have an ex daughter in law that I loved so much.I am so sorry about the cake plate.

Denise said...

Oh that is so sweet........ She is blessed to have you in her life even though she is not "family" there are too few people in our lives that hold our hearts....... you hang on to her ........ She brings you joy.... and take those pieces of broken glass and MAKE SOMETHING!! All kind of projects on the internet for broken glass and china.....

Lallee said...

I know that was a very big loss for you, Mary. I am so sorry. I have an ex-daughter-in-law too that I dearly love. I am so glad we were able to continue to be friends so I could share my love for her. She is finally dating someone new and I know our relation will eventually change, but I will always think of her as a daughter.

So glad to read you are feeling some better.

Hugs,
Lallee

bluemuf said...

Mary, How sad. I know exactly how you feel. You get so attached to your daughter-in-laws and it is a great loss when something happens. It's good you are keeping the communications open.

Hugs Karen

Margaret Cloud said...

I am commenting with tears in my eyes, I know how you feel, I to love with all myself. I am sorry you broke your glass cake stand, maybe you have a picture of it used on a special occasion, you could put the photo on the dresser in its place, just trying to make you feel better.

TattingChic said...

Oh, that is sad, yes, it is so hard to lose people through divorce! I miss my ex-Mother-in-law dearly! She's a sweet, dear lady!
I just stopped by to say thank you for stopping by to enter my giveaway! Good luck to you! :)

willzmom said...

Mary, I'm so sorry, I know that your heart hurts. You are such a sweet person to recognize that it's not the "stuff" but the people that matter the most. Take good care.

IsabellasCloset said...

Mary, I'm so sorry for your broken cake dish & the loose of seeing your dauhjter in law.. I do understand. The tears are not streaming down my cheeks.. Life can be so sad.
Hugs ~Mary~

Sandi McBride said...

You know just because they are not together doesn't mean that you can't still love her...I know you know that...and she certainly isn't going to think that you broke the cake plate that you loved on purpose...so call her and tell her you love her...I'm sure she'd be glad to know
hugs
Sandi

Cheryl said...

So sorry for your loss. Your memories sound wonderful.

Tea Time and Roses said...

Oh sweet Mary, I am so sorry about your cake plate. The plate may have shattered but the love that you and your ex daughter in law have for one another is indeed unbreakable...what a beautiful and wonderful thing the two of you share. What a beautiful Post.

Smiles...

Beverly

Lea of Farmhouse Blessings said...

I'm so sorry, Mary. How disappointing, but just know that even though the piece may be the love it represents never will be.

Hugs,
Lea

KarenHarveyCox said...

I think sometimes we bury so many emotions we hardly know that they are there. I am so sorry that your cake dish is broken, but your beautiful relationship sounds so alive. Blessings, Karen

TRES BELLE said...

What a beautiful tribute to your ex-daugher-in-law. I felt exactly the same way only towards my mother-in-law. She was my "best friend" my confident and when she passed in February of last year, I lost the only person I could really share things with.

I feel the heartfelt emotion of this post and know the sadness you feel. I am so glad you have your granddaughter and that your daughter-in-law shares her so freely. Please stop by anytime for a visit and thank you for bringing back, with a flood of tears, I might add, the memories that fill my heart and the wisdom that she shared with me before she passed.

Kris